the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
