I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
