why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
