Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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