Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Randomize
