i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
