If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Randomize
