this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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