Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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