My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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