..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
