he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Randomize
