Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
