i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize