If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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