Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
the day after is always just damage control
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
These tits shall not be calmed
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
