K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Come see our sink grown plant.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
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