I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
