Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I just found a bag of teeth...
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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