Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
