I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
My first STD was from a foam party
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
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