No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
