We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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