hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Randomize
