Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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