Christians are straight up FREAKS
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
