Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
