real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I would fuck him just for his dog
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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