i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
