Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
