reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
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