Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
