You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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