Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
My vagina is very pro this idea
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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