She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
