piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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