Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
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