So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Randomize
