I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
