For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
