i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
