you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize