But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Randomize
