Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize
