I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize