im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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