Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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