69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize
