white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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