She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
